Kagami~

Reading bluemist’s post brought back this rush of (what feels like) ancient memories about this one time I confessed to someone. I don’t really remember what brought it up, but I decided that I was going to take the risk. I spent a really long time planning something out and when an opportunity presented itself I was going to act. Somehow I worked up the courage to do it. However, being the overly shy and naive person that I am, I confessed via a poem. I still cringe at the fact that I did that. It rhymed too. Oh God. (=_=;;) Rhyme scheme… _|-|O Yes, I used to write poetry. I even took a poetry class during my first year in college that basically said rhyme makes poetry formulaic–but I did it anyways. I had never been so bold in my entire life. I think I wanted it so much, and I don’t think I had ever wanted something so bad in my entire life up to that point.

Unfortunately, I didn’t get a straight answer and the following week I felt like I was being ignored. Less than a few weeks later, we weren’t talking even though we talked nearly everyday up until that point. Maybe I wasn’t too cognizant of the situation. Maybe I was too pushy by expecting some sort of answer sooner than later. She told me that she already knew I liked her (someone told her), but was actually waiting for me to say something. Maybe that hurt me. Perhaps she had no romantic feelings for me because she never acted. Eventually, it got too weird for me, that I ended up going back into my shell. We didn’t talk anymore.

About 8 months later I got a random phone call from someone and when I picked up I heard someone in the background and then that person hung up. I thought I was disconnected, so I called the number back, not thinking about who it could be. It was her. She asked me how I was and we there was some awkward small talk. She then asked me if I was mad at her. I told her no, but in truth, I was at least back when it happened. How could I not be? This person who I had gotten to know so well and spent so much time with… then it was nothing. There were times when it was like we were already dating, just without a title. It wasn’t like I was straight out rejected. There wasn’t a “no” nor the realization that a love was unrequited, but it was like she betrayed our relationship–our friendship. I was happy when with her. My feelings were genuine. Who knows, maybe it was me who betrayed our friendship by closing up because I was really hurt. The phone call I got was pretty short and we discussed hanging out again, but we never spoke to one another again.

I think it helped that during that time of my life I was incredibly focused on school and getting into a Master’s program. I probably was pretty cold to her on the phone too (To be fair, I was studying for the GRE and had just taken a practice exam and bombed a verbal test). I had moved on for the most point and wasn’t interested in a relationship anyways. However, I always wondered why I would get a random call like that. I always wondered what her feelings were. How could she have known I liked her for so long, yet things weren’t any different between us? I don’t know. That is an answer I will never know. It’s probably why I root for happy endings in 99% of the stuff I watch (the 1% being School Days). It’s nice seeing the happy ending that I didn’t get. It’s never as easy confessing, getting an answer, and then going from there. I just wish it was.

LOADING. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

Enough of that crap. Condolences to those who actually read this far.

DS Lite 4TW!

Self-promotion. Literally. Awesome KyoAni. Awesome!

As for the rest of this episode, this has to be one of the best Lucky Star episodes I’ve seen in a long while. Who knew deer could be so awesome? Poor Tsukasa. I’ve always been pretty ambivalent towards the series. I watch each episode, but it’s never a priority. I laugh through most of the episodes, but usually forget about them after watching them once. There was just a lot of good stuff this time around and practically no KyoAni pimping (save for the tasteful shot above). The Kagami stuff of course stood out, but what was of real notice was Kagami and Konata’s friendship. We’ve always known those two were close friends, despite always poking fun at each other, but when Kagami had something on her mind, it was Konata that noticed. The music was a nice touch too. So was that dramatic pause.

Lucky Channel. Hahahhaa! Shiraishi finally snapped! Welcome to Idaho indeed. I’m not really a fan of Lucky Channel and I usually end watching the episode after just skimming over it. The Shiraishi ED songs at times can be amusing, but it usually because Fukuhara Kaori is cute. If they release a CD of that stuff, I refuse to listen to it. The remixes of Motteke! Sailor Fuku were already bad enough.

There is a reason zoos and campgrounds have those “Please do not feed the animals” signs all over the place. It’s not just for their safety. Poor Tsukasa had to learn the hard way. At least it wasn’t me among among others To Heart fans mobbing her for a moe~ladden snippet of her saying, “Hiroyuki-chan! Asa da yo!”

Make sure you incinerate zombies…

…or go for the head shot.

If not, after awhile…

…those annoying zombies…

…become Crimson Heads.

S.T.A.R.S.!!

Tsukasa runs for the save room…

…but doesn’t have an ink ribbon.

4 // itchy. tasty

Ruined for marriage, but we still love Tsukasa.